First, and most importantly, N just turned ONE! Seriously, one. I can't believe my baby girl is one. How the french toast did this year pass so quickly? A year ago I was holding my darling 7 lb 5 oz baby and now I have a quick moving, belly laughing, 21 pound princess! Holy smokes!
So... what have I learned in my first year as a Momma?
Well, I can tell you one thing about mommyhood! I was born to be a Mom to N. She is the light of my life. She takes my breath away on a daily basis and I catch myself staring at her in awe every few minutes. I never ever thought I would be a Mommy to the most beautiful, sweet, compassionate, loving, extremely intelligent little girl. God really blessed me.
We made it through a year of breastfeeding as well! Well, 3 months of nursing and nearly 10 of exclusively pumping. Oh my word, that is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. Seriously.
I have learned that I can't always do things to please others. I need to do things for my family and myself, not for others. That's a hard one for me. I have always been a bit of a pushover, and I get walked on easily, but I really am starting to push back and do things for me and my family first, instead of what everyone else wants me to do.
I have truly found who my true friends are, and I am still learning. As soon as I got pregnant, some fled. Now that I have a one year old, my friend group has become smaller and smaller. But, I have made some new friends near where I live that truly keep my sanity! As a mom, you have to make friends close by! It truly will make things easier.
People that do not have children will not understand most things. They won't get why you can't go out for a late dinner, even though you need to put your baby to bed. They don't understand that sometimes you will need to cancel plans because your babysitter called and cancelled. They don't understand why they saw you tons before you had a baby and don't see you now. The same for phone calls and texts. The once immediately answered text may go hours before I get a chance to write back. Such is life.
My body will never be what it was when I was in High School. But, I am proud of my body! I weigh less now than I did before pregnancy, and wear smaller jeans, but I have more curves. I love my body. I love that I carried a baby! And, I loved my pregnant body so much; but, I do love the body I have now! I always see that FB post about tiger stripes (stretch marks) and it always makes me smile. I didn't get stretch marks when I was pregnant, but I do understand the message and I appreciate it!
Being a Mom is flipping hard! Way harder than I thought! My daughter is so awesome, and laid back, but there are days that I sit down for the first time after 4 or 5 hours and realize I am exhausted. There are days my husband and I bicker because we both have different parenting styles. Half the time, the bickering isn't even worth it. We don't mean to, but sometimes you just can't help it! You know?
I will say though I wouldn't change anything. I love N more than life itself. She is my sunshine. She makes me laugh so many times each and every day! I beam with pride around her and will never lose that happiness. She is such a blessing. I love that I am home with her each and every day. 24/7 she is the center of my attention. I could sit here and brag about her forever but I won't!
The last couple of months have been so busy for us! With N's birthday party, and N's Godparents getting married, we have been jampacked for 8 or 9 weeks now! All three of us were in the wedding and we had so much fun! N walked down the aisle with me, and all three of us danced down the aisle after the ceremony. We are so happy for her Godparents!!!
I have been SO blessed. Not only with the wedding stuff, or the birthday party, but just in life, with N and my family!
Here is N and I at the wedding.
Love,
Kailly
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