Today's post is about my second baby story, my Little M. :) It was an interesting pregnancy as I was chasing an almost 1 year old around while experiencing the same exhausting pregnancy symptoms. There was also a three month training in the middle while I was 5 or 6 months preggo! It was a challenge but it's worth it to me because I get to have my sweet husband in my life! Yes, being Mrs. Army is no easy task but it's my wifestyle and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world! :) I am just incredibly grateful that my husband was home for both of our babies births I know a bunch of women that endured labor and delivery on their own and wow ladies I salute you!! You are such amazing, strong women!
My labor and delivery of baby Little M was extremely different from my first birth experience! I was going in for a routine check up for my 38 week appointment. The doctor was amazing she was very thorough and said she wasn't liking the measurement and feel of things so she sent us straight downstairs to get an ultrasound. Of course I was scared but we saw that strong little heartbeat and to me everything seemed alright so I calmed down and watched my baby on the screen as the ultrasound tech did countless measurements and clicked away furiously on her computer screen. Hubbers and I could tell by the techs. face that something wasn't right so he asked, "What's wrong? What's going on? I don't like that face!" She smiled up uncertainly and said, "well do you see how little fluid there is around the baby? That's not good at all but the doctor will explain everything to you why don't you head upstairs now" So I cleaned up and almost ran to the elevator I was officially freaking out now! I got up to the doctor and she said well let's put you on a fetal monitor and just see how the little guy is doing after an hour she came in and said, "Alright Shannon it seems you have been leaking fluid for awhile so there is hardly any left in there for your baby. I know this isn't what you expected or how you wanted this to go but why don't you go home take a nap eat some dinner and come back and we are going to induce. I lost my mind! "If there's no fluid shouldn't we just do it now?! He's early!?! I am NOT ready for this and this is NOT what I planned... " My husband calmed me down as we left the office and drove back to our home. We packed the baby bag and we got our oldest son, (Big M) all squared away had dinner and dropped him off with the sitters we had arranged, our awesome Pastor and his sweet wife, and headed back to post to go have a baby.
It was a completely different experience as we drove to the hospital and I sat there holding my stomach willing my little guy to come out now. I was absolutely still in the car and kept asking my hubs, "Is this right? Is everything going to be ok? Is he going to be healthy? I just don't understand all this... My husband held my hand and assured me that yes everything was going to be ok he is going to be perfect! He knew this wasn't how I wanted things or how I had planned this at all so he just held my hand and kept reassuring me that we are all going to be fine and that I got this. :) (I sure do love that hubbers of mine!)
We arrived at the hospital right on the dot when they wanted us there and they hustled me into a room and got me all strapped to the monitors and plugged an iv in right away. (YUCK! I hate needles and IVs are the worst!) Our doctor came in and she tried to explain how things were supposed to go with an induction. I wasn't even having braxton hicksers when we got there so I was clueless as to how everything was gonna go down. She explained they would give me a pill to help soften up the cervix and then she'd come back in to check on us in an hour or so... 30 minutes later the contractions hit. I was amazed at how my body was responding and so were the nurses and the doc! She came in and I was breathing through the get started contractions I felt like a champ I was uncomfortable but it wasn't like my last labor where I shaking and out of control. So I felt pretty good of course I was still nervous and worried about our little one but I felt like we were progressing really well. The doc came in and said she wanted me to try to get some rest and I couldn't sleep so she gave me somethin' to sleep and said okay this will knock you out for awhile just count back from 10. To which I replied, "10.... 9 .... 7.... cookie........" Crash! I was out like a light! I remember dreaming I had actually had my baby and I was holding him in my arms when I startled awake to the nurse checking my vitals.
I honestly have some fuzzy memories after that but I know at some point I did get an epidural again (not everyone chooses that and that's completely ok but for me that is what gave me that momentary relief and boost of confidence that's just what I wanted for my labor and delivery experience they also put me on some serious pitocin to keep my contractions coming in a good strong pattern. When they upped the pitocin I started having some of my most intense contractions EVER and I don't remember much of the details of when I got checked and what I measured I just remember at one point we were getting toward his grand entrance into the world but I stopped progressing and the doc came in and checked the monitors and was getting concerned about Little M's heart rate and cautioned we don't want to wait too much longer or we may end up doing an emergency C section to which I replied "Ahh heck no! Let's do this!!" So I got determined and shortly after it was time to push... About eight to ten minutes after I started pushing and pretty much one and a half pushes he was out Hubby cut the umbilical cord and they placed him on my chest. They cleaned him up and I watched from my bed as my sweet husband helped give Little M his first bath and snuggled him close.
|Proud Daddy snuggling Baby Little M :)|
|Mommy and Baby Little M :)|
I did tear a little so I was getting stitched up as they did baby's little check up and concluded his bilirubin was high so try to keep him in the warmer/crib area as much as possible and a little bit after the nurse came in and we were able to try our first feeding my poor little fella couldn't keep it down and after the second or third (not entirely sure which) feeding that he threw up after the doctor came in and said he was concerned that Little M wasn't able to hold anything down in his tiny tummy he explained that it could just be some sort of air pocket or something that can be suctioned out or it could potentially be a gastrointestinal condition (that for the life of me I cannot remember the name of) where something inside is blocked and sealed and would require a surgical procedure to remedy the situation. He reminded us but again it could just be something small and not the long worded (scary) condition, but being as they didn't have a NICU at the military hospital we were at they would have to air evacuate Little M to Shreveport's hospital that has an amazing NICU... My heart sank I asked would I be able to go with my baby they told me that unfortunately there would only be room for the medical team and my baby boy. I went immediately from the unexplainable joy of experiencing my second baby and the happy tears I cried as I hugged him close and whispered how beautiful and amazing he is to panic, fear, and an absolute crippling uncertainty as we made the decision to send him ahead of us to Shreveport. After that everything was rush, rush and a blur of nurses coming in and out checking on Baby Little M and me and making very hurried preparations for our precious little one to leave in the helicopter.
|Sweet tiny baby Little M|
I remember when the NICU emergency medical team came in they were wearing crisp navy blue scrubs and they brought in a HUGE incubator covered baby crib on wheels and as they were finishing getting him all secure the head nurse (that my husband felt almost instantly reassured by as she was wearing a Jeff Gordon lanyard with her ID) asked me if I wanted to come over and see him before they had to leave, I said of course and I reached in and put my finger in his tiny little hand and closed my eyes and prayed harder than I have ever prayed in my life! I looked down at him in this giant contraption and whispered "I love you my Little M" and the head nurse turned to me and said I will personally be taking care of your baby on the transportation and once we arrive in Shreveport I will treat him as if he is my own and we will be seeing you again very soon. She squeezed my hand and then they rushed out of the room and I followed them into the hallway and watched until they turned the corner and I just melted. It was like as soon as they turned that corner and I could no longer see my brand new baby boy my legs turned to jello and I could barely stand I felt sick to my stomach and was just sobbing hysterically when my husband hugged me and assured me that everything was going to be alright that it will all work out the way God has planned it. I looked up at him and asked him how he could be so calm. And he looked into my eyes and as he wiped away my tears he said he was upset too but he just knew that everything was going to be alright. He got me tucked back into the hospital bed and said he was going to run to the house and pack some extra clothes for us as we didn't know how long we would be staying in Shreveport with our Little M. I agreed that was best and when he kissed me and said he would be back as soon as he possibly could I just said thanks babe I love you too. Then he hurried out the door. My hospital room was eerily quiet and dark and it was the most alone feeling I have ever felt in my entire life! I just wept in that dark quiet room and I prayed and I prayed and I cried as I looked over at the now empty crib/basket. One of the nurses came in and checked my vitals and everything, she sat on the end of my bed and said, "Child, I don't know if you believe in God..." I nodded. She took my hand and looked me square in the face and said, "Well I do too and we both know that God is watching over that sweet baby boy of yours right now. She said I don't know what's going to happen but as believers we know that this is all part of His plan and it's hard to understand why but He really does have the whole world in His hand and He has you and me and Little M in His hand too." She prayed with me and I thanked her for being there and for just reminding me of the Truth in my dark, scary, seemingly hopeless situation. She just smiled the biggest smile I've ever seen and hugged me and said, "Child, this is when we need to seek God's answers most not our own! He is still the God of miracles and even after you leave here I will be praying for you and your sweet baby" She gave one more tight hug and reminded me that she would be back to check on me in a little while and to try to get a little rest. I was still crying softly as I tried to close my eyes and rest. Nurse Love wherever you may be, I just pray God gives you a special blessing for having such an uplifting impact on a terrified mama who was losing faith as she wept in her dark empty hospital room! You are an amazing woman and I will never forget those powerful words as long as I live!!
Shortly after my husband returned and he asked if I had heard anything and tears just fell down my cheeks as I told him I hadn't we just sat together and he said he had called our sitters that had Big M and let them know the situation and packed our bag and everything was ready to go as soon as we got discharged. This is when I started harassing the new shift of nurses. They told me the things I needed to do before they would allow us to go and I pushed my body to heal like now! My baby needed me and I willed myself to just be ok to go and I changed my clothes. I bugged those poor nurses probably every 20-30 minutes until they finally came in with the discharge paperwork and reminded me that I had just given birth very recently and I MUST take it easy. I grabbed those papers and pretty much ran down to the car. We drove straight to Shreveport and had to check in scrub in and I walked into the NICU for the first time. True to her word that same head nurse was holding my baby boy in her arms rocking him when we walked in. I was so happy to see her and looked at my little one all hooked up to a million kinds of tubes and just blinking awake as we walked in and the nurse asked if I wanted to hold him I was terrified that I was going to somehow bump something or hurt my little guy so I opted not to she put him back into the crib and explained that they were running some tests and they had more to do so we were probably going to be here for a bit but she gave us the timeline of "milestones" that they were looking for in order for him to be released home with us. I cried some more and was so timid around Little M. My husband was the first to really hold him and change his little diapers and he was so amazing in how he took care of our baby and me while we were up in Shreveport!! I remember they did some x rays and found a blockage of some sort but they couldn't figure out if it was the condition the doc was originally afraid of or if it was something less intimidating... So they did test after test and they had to suction things out and they had to keep him on an iv and do more tests. It was incredibly frustrating to feel so helpless while someone else cared for MY baby! But we celebrated each "milestone" and soon he was "unplugged" from all the tubes and I was able to cradle and breastfeed Little M. We were there for almost a week before we were discharged to take Little M home and be reunited as our family. When we got home we introduced Big M to Little M and they have been two peas in a pod ever since!
The family that God has given us is just amazing and we are so abundantly blessed.... and we are about to blessed again!! :) I am pretty sure that silly stork from the Disney movie Dumbo was in my yard recently because we found out last Friday that our family is growing again!!!! It's true friends we are expecting our third child!!! :) I am not sure how far along we are our first appointment is on Friday so hopefully we can share an update in my next post! :) But I am so excited and happy to share our news with you!
|"yep that's definitely two pink lines..."|
I was just 1
then I found Husband
and "I" became "we"
and "we" became 2!
nine months of waiting...
we watched our "we" become a family
and just like that "we" became 3!
then as he started getting tall
a small something more...
our sweet little 3 quickly became 4!
and now as we watch each of them grow
...once again I'm starting to show ;)
our fantastic four together we thrive
our family of 4 is soon to be 5!?!
Well everyone I still can't believe how truly blessed we are! I am so unbelievably grateful for all of my sweet babies!! I hope as your day continues you say a prayer of thanksgiving for the blessings in your life! :) I know I am! Well I am going to wrap this post up I have missed posting for y'all lately and I am so happy to share our big news with you!! :)
Let the great age old debate begin .... boy or girl? I'm not sure but what do you think?
Alright everyone I have to run off for real now but I can't wait to update you on the happenings of my little MnMs and our latest edition of Baby Story #3 :)
lots of love and pink or blue hugs with extra sunshine for you today... Shannon ;)