Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Where have I been all my life??

Hey y'all it's Shannon...  :) I am so sorry I have been MIA lately! It's been super crazy busy at our house these days. Hubs is still in the field which means that this mama is flying solo for a bit longer. Which is challenging as I potty train 2 small boys, maintain a level of acceptable cleanliness in our chaotic home, and continue growing a tiny human inside of me and all the while I've been growing my Scentsy business and even managed to earn an award and my first promotion!! (woot woot) ;) Needless to say I have been one busy mama and throughout these past few solo weeks I have been learning how easy it is to stress yourself out! I have seen just how quickly I can feel overwhelmed when everything feels like it keeps piling up. So here are my tips to de-stress and still feel accomplished at the end of the day without burning yourself out.

1. I have started attempting to wake up at least 15 minutes or so before my littles so that I can enjoy some me time first thing in the morning. Whether I use that time to have a cup of coffee/tea and read my Bible/devotions, or I hop in the shower to feel more refreshed and ready for the day, or let's face it just get dressed and look semi human! Regardless of what I accomplish during that time it's just that extra boost in the morning that helps me face another day. 

2. Once the kiddos wake (lately they have been rising with the dawn it seems) we give good morning hugs and kisses and typically have breakfast and watch some cartoons I attempt to get my dishwasher downloaded and reloaded with the previous nights' dinner dishes. For some reason if my sink is not clean and empty my whole house seems to fall apart like the sink has it's own gravitational force and all clutter and mess is just drawn toward it .... I swear. So trying to keep my sink shiny and dish free is a priority for me. 

3. Try to be as flexible as you can .... this is hard but children will be children and they will inevitably make messes and or need your attention at this very second or they will just lose their little minds! So when I find a spare minute to organize or attempt to fold laundry or some other quick fix chore typically my kiddos will absolutely NEED my full undivided attention at that exact moment... so rather than fight them and allow laundry to take my time I try to include them in whatever I am doing but if it's just more of a hindrance than help it's just worth it for my sanity to tuck whatever it is away and go play with the littles or at least find them a new productive activity.

4. Kids are repetitive and kids get very wrapped up in whatever they are doing at a specific moment so they can be difficult to refocus sometimes and it's easy to become annoyed by, "Mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mama, mama, mommy mommy, mommy.... MOMMY!!!!!" But in those moments I try to remind myself that they are MY babies they are my amazing beautiful blessings and they are just kids they don't understand....  it's easy to just be sidetracked and not spend valuable time playing with them and learning and growing but it's not worth it.... 

5. This is probably most important.... Give yourself permission to make mistakes and to let some things go... Super mom is not a realistic or attainable goal!! Trying to be Super Mom is a way to work yourself to the bone and dig yourself into a deep depression... Does your house have to be spotless? Really? Does it? So what if there are toys on the floor if you have kids that means they are playing and having fun! Do you really have to hand frost 47 cupcakes with elmo faces on them complete with textured frosting fur .... No! If you are trying to keep up with Miss Dolly Domesticity who is absolutely perfect (and remember no one is, so this is false) but if you are trying to keep up with that gal  who is just always beautiful her house is spotless her kids are the best most well mannered children you've ever seen and she sews her own clothes and bakes cookies and pies for everyone for absolutely any reason and her garden is perfect and she has everything together ... Stop now .... it's okay to not be a Stepford wife and mother!!  Why do women put such ridiculous expectations on ourselves?!? I know I like to be presentable and have a clean house too heck, I even dabble in some crafting and baking from time to time but we DON'T have to do it all!!!! Just giving ourselves permission to be ourselves and not try to be some kind of super mom allows us to feel accomplished with our own realistic goals!

   We all have to do lists a mile long.... make breakfast, get kids dressed, let the dog out, do the dishes, do the laundry, fold the laundry, finish the dishes, wipe down the table and counters, vacuum the living room, make beds, clean the bathroom, pay the bills, run the errands, grocery shop, make lunch, re clean kitchen, more laundry, more cleaning, more cooking, and by the time we get our kids in bed our head is just spinning and we are done for the night we barely make it into our bed let alone try to shower or prep ourselves for tomorrow. And for what really, don't we all wake up and do it again the next day... so what I'm saying is wouldn't we all be happier if we put less on our to do list and spent more time with our family and friends! I have learned that good friends will look past your 'mess' and just be happy with your time! Kiddos really don't care if your bed isn't made or theirs for that matter, though I agree it should be done from time to time does it have to bog you down on that to do list we all get wrapped up in?? I guess my new strategy is this... if it's only going to stress you out more than it is going to benefit you to do it right now just worry about it another time! There is so much we would like to do and enjoy but feel like we can't because we are still striving to be that perfect mom or that perfect wife and really for what? I love when my kitchen sparkles but my little MnMs laughing and giggling as we make playdoh animals and dinosaurs means so much more to me than a spotless white glove inspected kitchen! I enjoy having all of my laundry clean and folded and put away but it's not worth it to me to do four or five loads of laundry and miss out on my boys getting those grass stains on the knees of those pants... Right now my boys are little and they want me around and someday they won't anymore so I don't want to miss a minute of that sweet laughter or those infectious smiles and especially their creative little imaginations that can transform a blanket and a chair into a deep dark cave where the bats are sleeping mom! or can turn a paper plate into a steering wheel.... these are the memories I want to make WITH my children not as a bystander who washes dishes and folds the laundry... I'm their Mama and not a nanny they are MY littles and no one elses so why forfeit those amazing memories for a pristine perfect house and an alphabetized pantry and pinterest inspired homemade curtains!!? Well think what you will of me but I choose to live with a little mess in my life and soak up all the memories I can! Our babies won't be little for long so really why stress ourselves out with that to do list and miss them growing up?? Now am I saying that our homes should be a disaster and completely unlivable absolutely not. Kiddos need a safe healthy environment to grow and thrive in but that doesn't mean we have to have our house spotless 24/7! (I hope this is making sense my pregnant brain likes to jumble my words and thoughts a bit at times) but any how ask yourself what is SO important on your to do list that you will choose to spend time doing that over spending time making memories with your children and the ones you love?

Hope y'all are having a fantastic week and that your memory banks are abundantly wealthy! 
sending your sunshine hugs and polkadot preggo smiles...Shannon:)

baby appt is comin' up any guesses how far along we are??

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